Please pray for Jeff. I talked with him for a long time last night and he is really struggling. Single parenting is not an easy task. I have done it for 10 days and by the time the ten days is up I have my 3 just about locked in closets while I sit outside in tears. Jeff has well exceeded the 10 day point. Parenting is exhausting to begin with but doing it by yourself from 6AM to 11PM has got to get old. Please pray that Jeff would have wisdom in parenting and the energy to carry on as a single dad. My heart is grieved by all that is on his plate and the exhaustion in his voice. There are so many things that Karin (and we as moms) just do and then when that stops you realize all the work that goes into just being a Mom. Sometimes my kids come in ask me trivial questions, "Can we go out for dinner?" "Can I watch TV?". Dumb stuff that I have the answer to but just get tired of making all the decisions so I say, "Go ask your father" just so someone else can do the thinking for a while. Jeff is at that point and there is no one else to ask. He has help from his family and Karin's family - lots of it - but they have their own lives as well. I could go on and on about this but I will spare you and just ask you to pray. God is bigger than single parenting. And THANK GOD, Salina and Noah have a father that loves them and is around. Not everyone is as fortunate. That is my Mrs. Sunshine spin on that.

We are up to 15 people who have notified me about going to have a skin check. Great!

Here is a cut and pasted email from Karin's Massage Therapist, Kim. Thanks for making us aware Kim! Let me know how your appointment goes. :)

"As a massage therapist, I see parts of people's bodies they can't see such as their backs, back of their legs etc. I am always willing to point out something that doesn't look right and encourage my client to make an appointment with their doctor. I was just reading a massage magazine tonight that had a great article on melanoma. A M.T. found a melanoma on the bottom of her husband's foot during a massage. She pointed out a couple of things that I either hadn't heard of or didn't register in my mind before. Her husband's melanoma site had been where a fire ant had bitten him 4 years prior. The area had suddenly changed and caught her eye during that massage. So areas of skin that may have been injured are also potential melanoma sites. She also stated to have a person have both a woman and a man check their skin for changes. Women are better at seeing pigment changes; men at shape and density. Also take precautionary pictures every three months. Dating and comparing them. A great informative article. I don't know if you have posted this website, www.skincancer.org/melanoma/index.php ."

Can I also just say how irritated I am that our Cluster Map has been archived??? I had no idea. I liked those big red dots. Sigh . . .

Hard to believe but this picture was taken a year ago today. What I would give to hang at Fentons with her today. . . That was such a fun night. Even though she was very sick and did not feel well she had me in stitches the whole way to Oakland. Remember, Jeff?

Here is some exciting news!!!

Those of you that attended the Run for Karin nearly a year ago received a bracelet as a Thank You for coming. Two weeks ago Jeff's broke and there were no spares to be found. He has taken to wearing a bracelet that he found in Karin's things that says, "Think Pink". Us girls know where that is from! Anyway, I ordered some more bracelets that we are going to make available for cost, if you want one or need a replacement. More information to come on that as soon as I figure out the price. Jeff will not be making any money on these. You can buy one for what they cost to purchase.

Time for some updates: Since my post of encouraging people to visit the dermatologist I know 12 people that have gone and visited their dermatologist or have made an appointment. My husband went about 3 weeks ago and they biopsied a mole on his stomach. The mole was found to have "atypical" qualities to it and he went in 2 weeks ago to have it removed. He has a nice little incision that has 8 stitches. I bet he is glad that his nagging wife made him the appointment. :)
If anyone else has an update email me! I still need 38 people to make appointments!
Here is an interesting article that one of Jeff's Prudential co-workers sent to me. http://health.msn.com/health-topics/cancer/articlepage.aspx?cp-documentid=100201678&page=1 The article suggests that FDR possible had Melanoma, unknown to him. Thanks for the article, Kelly!

THINK PINK! Just a reminder that tomorrow is Pink Day!

Don't get spoiled by all these posts so close together. It is like the good ole' days when Karin was around feeding me info.
Soooo, May is Skin Cancer and Melanoma Awareness Month. There are several factors that put you at a higher risk for this yucky disease. Again, I am not a doctor (although a mother!) so I am passing information that has been shared with me to you. Some factors include; light skin, light eyes, those that do not "tan", if you have 2 or 3 bad burns while growing up, exposure to tanning beds or sun lamps, family history (blood related), one or more atypical moles and having 50+ moles on your body. If a suspicious mole is caught early your chances are very good. Karin was very good about going to her dermatologist once a year since her original mole was removed 8 years ago. I don't want to get into why the melanoma in Karin's body was not detected earlier by doctors. That is a waste of time and it will not bring Karin back. HOWEVER, we can change what we do!! In light of May being Skin Cancer Awareness Month I would like to rally the Blog readers to visit a dermatologist. Yes, it will take an hour out of your day, but it may add years to your life. Open up the phone book and pick one out and tell them you want a full body check. And, it is not a complete exam unless you take off your clothing! They will make a "map" of your moles and then there is a baseline for any growth. So here is what I propose: I would like to see 50 of Karin's friends making an appt. to go the the dermatologist next month in Karin's honor. Salina and Noah know how much Karin is loved. They are also young and need to be reminded that their Mom is not forgotten. This is something you can do to honor Karin and remind Salina and Noah how loved their mother is and always will be. No past tense there. So, after you make your appt. email me so I can keep a tally and I will post the tally. Email me at bethey12@yahoo.com. You are not too young or too old. Karin is proof of that. Cancer does not discriminate.
I wanted to share a personal story that drives this home. Last year, when Karin first got sick my brother in law (lives in Palm Springs, CA) got on his computer and looked up what a cancerous mole looked like. He felt that the mole he was questioning on himself was not anything. He later spent some time with a close friend, Jason. Jason is in his early 30's and is a healthy father of 2 and a paramedic. My brother in law noticed a mole on his friend's arm and pointed out to him that it looked suspicious. Jason went the the dermatologist for the first time and it was biopsied and proven to be cancerous. He had the mole and a large chunk of his arm removed. None of this would have happened without Karin's story.
Looking forward to hearing from YOU!!!

Yes, you have the right Blog. I know just enough about this blogging business to get myself in trouble. Today I added the Playlist to the left with some of Karin's favorite songs or songs that remind me of her. One of Jeff's favs is on there too. I am going to add some Oldies, well, Oldies to our age group. More to follow on that. So, those of you that check here on the sly will now have to turn the volume down. Hopefully you will be encouraged by her songs.

So, today I learned the story behind the Beignets. Jeff says that pic was taken at Cafe Du Monde. http://www.cafedumonde.com/beignet.html Apparently, it is world famous. He says he has seen celebrities there lots of times. So you order you plate of Beignets that have a serious amount of powered sugar on them. Bargain of the day at $1.85 for three. When you go with a local they tell you to smell them and as you smell them they blow the sugar in your face. That explains the mess all over the kids.

Things are quiet on the home front. Johanna and her husband, Todd, visited last weekend. Jeff enjoyed watching Salina and Johanna hang out like a mom and daughter would but it also made him sad that Salina can't have that all the time. :(

Here are a few pics that Jeff sent me from their time in LA. The first one speaks for itself. That child is her mother, up and down, left and right. Forgot to ask if Salina roped him into a purchase. :) The second is a pic of the 3 eating Beignets.

Did you know . . .

A friend of Terry's, Nancy, asked me to update the Blog with information concerning protective clothing for the upcoming summer and swim season. You can get "rash guard" shirts to wear while swimming or playing at the beach or whatever water activities you and your family do. They are getting to be more widely available and are cheap. I have found both rash guard shirts and board shorts with UPF & SPF protection in the fabric for the upcoming season. Some place I would recommend looking are: Gap, Land's End (you can get a Sears or on line), LL Bean and Old Navy. The stuff at Gap is really cute :). If your kids do not already wear the shirt to swim in it may take some getting used to but is a small price to pay for the added protection.

God made the Sun!! We need some sun to live. The sun produces vitamin D that our bodies need to stay healthy and it actually protects us from some cancers. I read on the Internet that if you live above Atlanta, GA, you most likely do not get enough sun in the winter months. Talk to your doctor if that applies to you to see if you should take supplements or spend an hour or so outside in the morning without sunscreen on. I am not a doctor, I just want to put the information I have found out there.

He knows the number of your days

It was a year ago today that the cancer that lived in Karin's body was named and given a stage. Today was also the first day she took chemo. I remember her calling me from the bathroom in the Kaiser lab while she was peeing in a cup for them to tell me the awful news. She had hide in the bathroom to tell me because Jeff did not want her to worry me. (Like I wasn't going to find out?) :) It is hard to imagine how one day can forever, I mean F O R E V E R, change you but that is exactly what happened. This scripture is coming to mind:
"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." Psalm 139:13-16
God knew all along how many days Karin would have and it would not be enough for those of us left behind.
Funny story to make you laugh. About 2 years ago Karin got this bright idea to rip out the carpet in the downstairs of their house. She moved all the furniture, pulled out all the pad, all the carpet and the tack strip in the cement slab foundation and then cleaned it all up. She did all this WHILE JEFF WAS AT WORK. It was actually smart thinking on her part. She knew if she riped out the carpet Jeff would be forced to buy new carpet. And it worked. She's was a smart gal.
The day Karin started radiation she called me right after it was over to tell me that the radiologist was a cutie. She also told me that as she lay on that bed about to be radiated she was getting ready to ask the cutie pie how long she had to live. The words were literally getting ready to come out of her mouth and God spoke to her and said, "Don't you trust me?" She replied "yes." and never thought to ask again. What am amazing girl.